Singer Porunn Antonia was single with her five-year-old daughter when she had her second child a year ago. She fell in love when her then-boyfriend left her when she was four months pregnant with their baby.
She discussed this difficult experience in a sincere interview with “Megalopreneur” in Iceland tonight, but Porunn Antonia says she wants to open the discussion about the situation of women who find themselves single either during pregnancy or just after childbirth.
“I’m not a glamorous person, I’m a person and I’m not afraid to show that I’m a person. I’m just human, I’m just a girl, I’m a woman, I’m a mom, I’m a friend, I’m a daughter. I start crying when things are difficult, I start crying when things are beautiful. “I’m just emotionally open and I feel like a person who interests people and all of a sudden I have 11,400 people on my Instagram following me, I feel I have a social duty not to be selling any perfection that doesn’t exist,” says Porunn Antonia.
Prioritize rest as a single mother with two small children
That’s why she has, for example, published pictures of herself unpainted and “unfiltered” and shown pictures from her kitchen where there is a seros and a cat mat everywhere.
“And I’m so tired I’m crying next time. It is possible. It is disgustingly difficult to be a parent, no matter if you are single, in a relationship, married, whether you have ten children or one child. You can say that it is difficult because it is the most beautiful and important role in life. ”
As a single mother with two small children, Porunn Antonia says that she has had to prioritize and she has prioritized rest.
“I have not prioritized about going to the gym or going to work too early or having a perfect home. I have had to prioritize rest. I had a very difficult emergency and a co-operation and all sorts of things like that and I were just completely done with it. There were certain difficulties there at first that just took everything away from me and I’m now getting out of it. ”
And then you were also in love grief?
“Yes, I was in love and I also find it so beautiful when people say it out loud because of how lucky are you to be able to love? And this was 100 percent, not my husband because my husband had not left me pregnant. He’s not the man I wanted to build my life with. Did I want to hold on to this man when I was pregnant? Of course, because that’s what my brain and my body and my family are saying. I thank the woman who took this man, you know, very early after we broke up? Oh, yes, she’s just a hero in my eyes. I thank her very much because this is just all for the best and I wish them all the best. ”
Wants to open the discussion on the mentality of pregnant women
Þórunn Antonia then decided to get in touch with women in the same situation, that is, who become single during pregnancy and do an independent study of their mental world and emotional life.
“Because I felt so little about it. I felt so little support. I went and sought help as everyone who is going through hardships should do and there is nothing to be ashamed of. I went and sought help from a psychiatrist, a psychologist, from all sorts of teams and I felt very rich in everyone just: “Now you just have to find the valkyrie in you and stand up for yourself,” and when you are just completely shattered, it is not something that can be said to a person. You do not tell a person who is dying of depression “Just stand up.” This is a much more complicated process. ”
She says all the women she spoke to have had suicidal thoughts.
“They wanted to die, they do not look forward to performing but the mother nature is so strong that no one dares to talk openly about it. Nobody wants to hear a pregnant woman say, “I don’t think I want to live anymore,” because it’s so taboo to be pregnant in the first place and not be incredibly grateful for the gift that not everyone can have children. and all this. That’s why I’m just talking openly about this. It’s not to cast a shadow over my grandfather, it’s simply to open up the discussion about the mental world of pregnant women, “says porunn Antonia, but the interview with her can be seen in its entirety in the player above in the article